I spent most of the weekend at a caravan park and it is something I haven’t done for a few years. I must admit I had forgotten how ‘things’ work in a trailer park.

What is the deal with all this borrowing? I guess its good in a way, you lend people things and you borrow things. As long as it is all returned there should be no problems.

People walk in and out of your site like it’s a common community which I suppose it is. But it is a little disconcerting when you are carrying out some daily body ‘maintenance’ and you look to your left and some strange women is looking at you through an open window.

Night times are a little strange too, I tend to get a bit rowdy and I can understand how this could be frowned upon. So to all the people at Kingsliff caravan park Saturday night I am ‘sorry’.

To the person who found my mobile phone and returned it to the caravan park office I say thank you. Honesty is back!

And to the bouncer at the Kingscliff Tavern. You need to make your instructions clearer, I don’t understand whispers at 3 o’clock in the morning. If you want to redeem yourself leave a message and we can shape up for round two anytime.

Its time once again for everyone to jump aboard the knowledge train. If you have a question you need answered you know where to go. Ask Shirvy!

Dear Shirvy
SJ I have to ask the question…do you get the girls, I think NOT. You need some serious coaching.

Shirvy Says
I could take this question two ways and will try and answer both.

Do I get the girls, as in do I understand girls?

Yes, you all seem to be looking for different things and sometimes a combination of a bunch of different things. You are a wind sock of thoughts and emotions unlike men who can generally count their current emotions on three fingers. Me hungry, me thirsty and me horny.

Do I get the girls, as in am I dating a lot?

I do ok in the dating area. I am no moisturiser using pretty boy who loves the nightclub scene and thrill of the kill and I ain’t no 40 year old virgin. I am happy with my abilities and have come to the conclusion that if someone disagrees with my jokes or conversation that’s fine.

Dear Shirvy,
I am interested to know that if your father did something to another family before you were born and now one of these family members is making a demand for an apology for your fathers actions what would you do?

Shirvy Says
I would suggest that your fathers actions were his choice and not yours. You cannot be held responsible for his actions thus apologising would seem a bit silly. If your question had other connotations it is a little more difficult to say.