I see a story in the news today about Cronulla sharks sponsor PKF, who are an accounting firm, reviewing their sponsorship of the club. Their concerns appear to be that they have sponsored Cronulla and intern Cronulla is to blame for Greg Bird’s apparent attack on his girlfriend. While Bird has been charged and it appears likely that he is goneski again the old adage innocent until proven guilty appears to be goneski too.

PKF have stated that “Our brand and image are everything. Quality and respect – it’s hard to keep talking to staff and clients about this if we don’t stand by it”

Yes, that’s what you should be concerned about! I have heard it all now, a bunch of accountants concerned about quality and respect. Where would those two lie in respect to an accounting firm I ask?

Quality. WHAT? you treat people real nice as you rip them a new one?

Respect, last time I checked accountants are below used car salesman on the respect scoreboard you bunch of self absorbed walking abaci.

Scenario 1. Tell the truth PKF. You are using this as a great free bunch of sponsorship in the media and you are strategically taking advantage of the free publicity.

Scenario 2. Tell the truth PKF. You paid a bit much for that sleeve sponsorship, hard times have hit and you want to get out. A couple of the senior partners have spent to much on purchasing the 52 foot sports-fisherman and the extensions to the house may have been a little unnecessary. Tell the truth PKF, you want to cut your losses and Greg Birds timing couldn’t have been better.

What about you, do you think that a footballers off field folly can really effect the “respect” or perceived “quality” of a sleeve sponsor? or has PKF got ulterior motives?

I had a rather animated discussion with a friend recently in relation to work performed ‘after hours’.

This is something I am sure we have all done when required to complete a project for deadline or assist a customer with an after hours service issue paid or unpaid is it is in my case. No I am not talking about that sort of after hours work. My annoyance is with getting into the office on Monday morning and checking my email to find emails sent from a colleague (cc’d to the boss of course) at say 10:30pm on a Sunday night or 6:45am on a Saturday morning. None of these emails are of an urgent nature, just run of the mill normal work dribble.

I find it stupid that a person would get up early on a Saturday morning or stay up late on a Sunday night to do non-urgent work. My suggestion is that the only reason said person is doing emails at those times is to make it look like they are a real hard worker and trying to portray themselves as ‘committed’ to the company perhaps more than others. In other words I think they are dirty rotten suck holes.

My comments of ‘suck hole-ism’ annoyed my friend as he suggested that maybe these people genuinely work at these times as a matter of convenience in their day to day lives. For example, they might skip some work time during the week and do it on a Sunday in lieu. I say bulldust dog!

I have three questions

1. Do you agree with my suck hole thoughts?

2. Has society really evolved to a point where any employee can work a 40 hour week spread over a 168 hour period as and when the employee sees fit?

3. If I ‘type’ all my emails at work during a normal 8 hour 8:30 – 5:00 weekday save them as a draft and then strategically send all of these typed emails from home at 10:30pm just before I go to bed, will my star rise?

It’s Australian Idol time of year again. A time when I am reminded just how much of a complete twit Kyle Sandilands is. You threaten Dave Hughes one more time Sandilands and I will pay for my own flight to Sydney to flog the snot out of you, you snivelling, fashion following, sword swallowing pooncey la la.

Even worse than Kyle is the audition process. Thousands of Niff Nuffs show up in the vain hope that they will be chosen to contest the title of Idol. In the process of signing up for the competition they are forced to sign over the rights for Australian Idol to use their audition on the show. Once you go into the room in front of the judges you no longer own your image or the horrendous noises that emit from your body.

Now I guess if you are going to audition for the show then you could expect to be on TV but I am not sure this fact sinks in with certain creatures. It seems that these same people who don’t understand the fundamentals of a contract, have also not bothered to check if they actually have any talent. Surely if you were toying with the idea of auditioning you would ask a friend to check out your ‘routine’ first? Unless said friends are agents of the devil, I don’t understand how so many horrendous auditions can occur.

I can watch the lead up to the audition including background story and mention of previous failures but there is something so horrific about the noise that comes out of their mouths that leads me to frantically change channels to ANYTHING else. Just a few bars can wreck my love for a song forever.

Not to say that there is some talent in the show, I am sure there is, it is just those dam auditions ensure I don’t watch for most of the season.

Why are we trying to tell China how to run their affairs? Some recent examples are.

Apparently Cadel ‘the Choker’ Evans suggests that China has made the Olympics the “made for TV games” and that they have tried to hide their treatment of the people. Thank you sir chokes-a-lot I had no idea that this would occur in a communist country. Do us a favour sir chokes-a-lot, stick to pedalling bikes and let others pedal political ideas. NIFF

The old faithful A Current Affair last night attacked the host nations policies on road rules especially those pertaining to helmets on motorbikes. A gruelling exposé showed hard evidence of helmet-less young children on the back of motor bikes. Oh no, somebody should start a charity to help the poor helmet-less. NIFFS

Apparently there is a pollution problem in Beijing and we somehow expect them to do something about it for our poor little winded athletes. You ok chokers, you all right mate? NIFFS

There also seems to be some concern over an area of China called Tibet. Tibet seems to think they are separate to China and China seems to think that Tibet is part of them. It also seems that a large percentage of the athletes and other groups of protesters have sided with the Tibet side of the argument and want Tibet ‘free’. I am not sure who is right or who is wrong here but I find the protestors annoyance at the Chinese governments disallowance of the protests amusing. How dare this communist government sensor free speech in its own borders!! NIFSS

I don’t understand why anyone thinks they can tell this country what to do. It must be because our country is perfect in every way and have unblemished human rights records and allow freedom of speech in all areas. NIFFS

I have made a call to some Japanese friends and I think you will find our little whale problem in Sydney will quietly disappear overnight. When you think about it, it is a win, win. Those poor old starving Japanese will finally have something to eat and the rest of the ‘free thinking population’ of this country (a percentage that seems to be decreasing exponentially) will have the opportunity to hear important news stories instead of ones about shark fodder. I even think the naming of the shark was done in such a way to garner sympathy. ‘Colin’ will always be that innocent simpleton on that Australian television show in Colin Carpenter in my mind.

I have touched on this before but I cannot for the life of me understand this countries fascination with these mammals? Hundreds of Koala’s, Kangaroo’s, Echidna’s, Emu’s, Cows/Bulls, Possums, Dogs, Cats and birds are killed on our highways every single day and know one bats an eyelid. Why the hell does anyone care about one whale?

Is it because they are big, thus ‘hugely’ important? Going by that logic if Kangaroos were 20 foot tall they would run this country.

Is it because they squeek and squeel? No, but even more reason to get rid of the noisy buggers in my opinion.

Is it because they eat shit loads of plankton? No, this matters not to Joe Public who probably don’t know what plankton is.

Is it because they have a blowhole? This possibly influences a small percentage of disgusting perverts in the affirmative but most people will not consider this a valid reason.

Non of the above in my opinion, I think the reason is far shallower…. It’s popular…That’s it, if your against the whales your against us. Like I-phone’s and the ‘save the environment’ corporate culture taking over the world, whale loving is at its zenith.

Enough of this dribble, I am hungry, who has some blubber?

Its all Olympics at the moment so I may as well live them.

Today’s discussion pits us against the rest of the world in a per capita showdown. I am sick and tired of us Aussies being mentioned as…..

Per capita the fattest on the planet.
Per capita the highest carbon users
Per capita the most bevans

It’s about time we talked about the per capita best country in the sporting world.

With one medal for every 4.6 million the USA is not so special
With one medal for every 21.7 million China is not so special
With one medal for every 4.5 million Russia is not so special
With one medal for every 2.3 million the UK is not so special

What about Australia with a medal for every 636,000 people.

Hoooray finally a per capita average we can be proud of. In you face rest of the world losers!!!!!

Another thing I appreciate is the way the US keep track of the medal tally all of a sudden.

It is pretty standard practice that the overall medal leader is the country with the most gold medals. Ties are decided on a count back of silver and bronze medals. This is the method that has been in use in my memory of the Olympics anyway.

Well not anymore, the Americans have decided to upgrade their medal tally and have gone with a new system that makes the Olympic medal leader the country with the most medals overall….. and surprise, surprise guess who wins on that basis?

On this basis I propose that the medal tally should be recorded on a participating country per capita basis. If it’s good enough for the Americans to standardize on a new system to slant the results in their favour its good enough for us.

Tabcorp today released its annual list of the biggest NSW TAB dividends for the year.

The blowout results on last November’s Emirates Stakes Day resulted in the biggest First 4, Quaddie and Trifecta dividends of 2007/08. The Emirates Stakes day Quaddie of $1.391 million eclipsed the biggest NSW TAB dividend of the 2006/07 racing season, which was a $701,993.60 First 4 on the Caulfield Cup.

Other highlights of the list of 2007/08 NSW TAB record dividends (for $1) included:
The biggest Win dividend was $168.10 for Greet The Day’s win in a South African Maiden Plate on 10 January.

The biggest Win dividend in harness racing was $140.30 (Jaccka Mort at Maryborough, 7 February 2008) and in greyhound racing was $108.10 (Rough Trip Tour at Ipswich, 13 May 2008).

A Muswellbrook Quaddie on 19 May was the highest paying Quaddie on NSW racing, with a dividend of $225,344.

International racing produced another record dividend with Futune’s third placing in an English Class 5 last October producing a $46 Place result.

The biggest harness Place dividend was $31.70 (Gold Cafe at Cobram, 10 April 2008) and for greyhound racing was $16.30 (Southpaw Delaney at Maitland, 22 November 2007).

The surprise wins of Can Opener and Midnight City at Wagga on 1 May 2008 produced the season’s record Running Double dividend of $5,847.30.

A Ballarat greyhound meeting was responsible for the biggest Daily Double of 2007/08. The combination of Booma Flossie and My Little Joice paid $1,894.

The biggest harness racing dividend across all bet types in 2007/08 was $55,402.40 for a Bendigo Quaddie (24 May 2008).

Mount Gambier delivered the season’s highest-paying Exacta with the one-two finish of Run Laurie Run and Johall last September paying $7,786.30.

Two $20,000-plus greyhound racing dividends were recorded – both on NSW events.

International racing set new big dividend records with a $81,427.80 Quaddie on New Zealand (13 November 2007). A $3,098.80 Quinella at South Africa on 30 April 2008 was the biggest paying Quinella of 2007/08 with the NSW TAB.

The majority of the biggest dividends on NSW racing were recorded at country or provincial meetings.
NSW TAB bet on more than 57,000 thoroughbred, harness and greyhound races in 2007/ 08. Racing from all Australian states and territories was bet on, as well as from England, Hong Kong, France, Dubai, Ireland, Japan, New Zealand, Singapore, Sth Africa and USA.