I did a little driving yesterday, nothing new there but I came across a few things that I don’t understand.
Example 1
Driving along a road that is normally posted at 100 km/h. Due to current road works the new spead is 80 km/h. I set the cruise control to 83 and sat back to cruise along. As I did (in the left lane of course) I was duly swamped by every car, truck, van and motorbike in the city. Clearly these people were speeding in the vicinity of 15 – 20 km over the limit without thought or concern about it.
Yet when the bastard gets back up to 100 km/h I am forced to pass every niff under the sun who will not drive at the speed limit. Why do people think its ok to speed in one area and not do the limit in another? It boggles my mind, especially when I am forced to endure these intellectual pee wees.
Example 2
Driving down a 60 km/h a single lane road, in a residential area, I was sitting just on 60 km/h when I notice some sort of white van flying up behind me. As I drove along this niff is clearly trying to get by me so I follow my line and maintain speed. Eventually a push bike lane opens up and he decides to pass me on the left. He then proceeds to drive around the following round-about at about 15 km/h and sticks his hand out the window to give me the bird for good measure.
I am not sure why I should receive such treatment? After all, its Christmas and those boys in blue are out everywhere. If you have an overpowering need to drive like a lunatic then I suggest you fire up the old Playstation or Xbox and stick to fantasy. Otherwise I will stick the nose of my car up your arse, roll your piece of shit van over, jump out a strike down upon you with great vengeance and furious anger!
greatest young cricketer for his generation and the killer, he is Australia’s next captain.
You seriously want this…
To represent Australian cricket?
News.com.au reported
Australian cricket vice-captain Michael Clarke has had the initials of bride-to-be Lara Bingle permanently etched into his bicep. The huge tattoo depicts a guardian angel sitting on a cross with the initials L.B. emblazoned at the top, near Clarke’s shoulder.
“I like tattoos. If I’m going to get one it has to be meaningful.”
A tough sticker wearing pussy has no place captaining Australia and I will be dammed if I am gonna sit idly by and let this limp wristed closet pillow biter ruin everything generations before him have built.
From her admittance to using botox to her flipping and flopping about the Traverston dam she is killing me!!
I don’t really care if she does or doesn’t use the botox, I just don’t know why has been made public knowledge. It doesn’t appear to have helped anyway…
She pissed me off big time when she announced that ‘due to the current economic conditions’ the Anzac Day weekday holiday would be cancelled next year. The shame!
We are now going to be force-fed fluoridated water and will more than likely be drinking recycled turds by January. On this, I think they tried the recycled water stuff in London in the early 1800’s didn’t seem to work to well however. Cholera killed thousands….. I know the new and improved ‘recycled’ system is much, much better than that of the 19th century, I am just concerned that we are only a niffy engineers design flaw or an absent minded generation Y maintenance planners stuff up away from drinking turd burgers. Not such good darts.
And to the worst of her crimes against the community….. In her early years she protested for women’s rights against Playboy Magazine. HOW DARE she attack Hugh and those poor little bunnies!
All of these added up means that we have a lunatic running the show and we didn’t even have a chance to vote her in, Peter Beattie took care of that!
I have a feeling that President Bush’s whole reign may be overshadowed by an attempted shoe to the skull. A mischievous Iraqi journalist took it upon himself to assassinate the commander and chief with a size 10 loafer. The first shot missed with an athletic duck from the man in charge but the second loafer was blocked by the presidents cat like reflexes.
For those who missed it here it is.
To further to gold President Bush commented on the fact that the journalist would not have been able to do this under Saddam’s dictatorship. He then proceeded to advise the world media that; in a way, the thrown shoe was a form of free speech!!
You can protect the president here…
Is it only me or can anyone see the newsreels and comedy reels for years to come showing President Bush and the ‘freedom’ he brought to Iraq?
I am disappointed for comedy reasons that W is about to end his tenure. It is with a heavy heart I present the following video with some of his magic that should endure through history.
I am sure he isn’t an idiot but man he can look bad at times.
Cheers to Kevin Rudd for making a hard decision yesterday. His decision to cut emissions by only 5% on 2000 levels may seem nothing to the screaming greenies out there but it is not going to be an easy target to reach.
Lets first acknowledge that I called these ‘items’ emissions. Not green house gasses as the greenies will call them. They are simply emissions. Green house gasses are based on a theory created around a pot clouded table at some sort of hoochie coochie-mudlo party in the 70’s. The term is incorrect in my opinion and leads to misunderstandings.
Back to the ramifications, just for a minute think about how much things have changed since 2000. One of the main contributors to emissions is getting those little black rocks out of the ground that enable us to create a chunk of these emissions in the first place. Since 2000 production of coal has increased exponentially (I am to lazy to research the figures, but its high, maybe some of my learned colleagues could confirm) and the burning of this black gold has kept a steady pace as well.
You will note since the years 2000 nearly everyone you know has either an Ipod or some sort of mp3 player. There are now DVD players / recorders, VCR’s, PS3’s, Wii’s, home theatres, Foxtel boxes, plasmas or LCD’s. Everyone has a three station cordless phone and the mandatory mobile on the side. The broadband modem blinks away for all hours and there is an average of 1.3 computers in every home, most of them on downloading goodness knows what 24/7. With all that heat coming out of these computers you need an air conditioner to cool the place down. Then there are coffee machines, pancake makers, home made bread machines (still don’t understand how this idea took off) and massage machines. The average anticipated electricity usage per capita has over doubled since the late 1990’s (and you wonder why the electricity network can’t keep up).
As a prick of a man who made life a misery for me in late 2005 told me ‘Electricity is a drug and it is spreading’. The only useful piece of information he ever dribbled.
If Kevin Rudd wants us to drop back to sub 2000 emissions then lets do it. It seems a hard but achievable figure. And you greenies who think otherwise, well you can piss off to Germany where you can join the 4th reich and ‘sort’ us out once and for all.
It was another collaps-a-thon in the final round of the Australian open when Kiwi David Smail took the gas and blundered a 4 stroke lead to end the day at 8 under. No real surprise there in my opinion, Kiwis can not take the pressure in any circumstance, sport or otherwise!!
The comedy of errors continued when a play off between South African Tim Clarke and Australian Masters gas taking runner up Matthew Goggin got to the 18th green. With Goggin in prime position on the green and Clark in the bunker it looked as though and easy two putt would see the playoff as a minimum continue for another hole. But Goggin had other ideas, when Clark got up and down out of the bunker Goggin made a horrendous 3 putt to hand the tournament to Clark on a silver platter.
I just can’t believe Goggin’s form. He threw away the Australian Masters and yesterday got himself in a position to win again and crumbled like last weeks dog turd. Please be aware members of the public, if anyone fitting Goggins description arrives at the Gap please tie him to a tree before he can jump. He may have slit his wrists so be ready with a needle and thread.
Apache Cat disappointed also yesterday with a battling third in the Hong Kong Sprint Group 1. He looked in good position but let another horse get a run just ahead of him at the top of the straight. Unfortunately it was this same horse he was unable to claim in the shadows of the post. I look forward to the next showing from the Cat.
