Note. Footy tipping comp table updated.

I read an article recently regarding a new plan for the single people in society to wear a badge so that other single people will know they are available.

I think a few hundred years ago somebody else had a similar idea. However their idea worked in reverse. If you were in a committed long term relationship both parties in this relationship would give each other special rings. Not only did the people who were married know what these rings meant it also was a sign to single people that the people wearing these specific rings.

I for one am sick and tired of talking to chicks that have boyfriends. If you are in a long term committed relationship get freakin married!! Don’t make me waste minute after minute chatting to you if you are taken, nothing annoys me more (excluding guerrilla gardeners).

Ha ha yes very funny, I know what you are all thinking out there. These girls are chatting to you and not liking what they see or hear and calling an audible and changing the play at the line of scrimmage. They suddenly pretend that they have a boyfriend to get away from my charms. Uh uh, I can be most impressive when on the chop so that is in no way what happens. Besides, I follow some of these girls to their homes to check…… just jokes.

I propose a new set of rules as follows.

If you have been going out with the same dude for more than 14.5 months. Get a dam ring on your finger or get out!

If you buy a house with some dude. Get a dam ring on your finger!

If you are a lesbian and hate men. Get a dam ring on your finger!

Other than this I am starting a new regime of chopping anything that does not have a ring on its finger. So boys, if you want to keep you girlfriend to yourself I suggest you call the priest and book a date cause I am coming for what is owed!

Sunday arvo, my joint, $5 cover charge, talk to me.