*Discloses a regretted Telstra 2 purchase that is still currently held.

I have done some financial research on Telstra and decided the following.

Telstra is probably one of less lucrative investments you could currently make. Whilst they do provide a decent dividend each year I think this severely hampers this companies ability to grow and pay off a pretty large debt.

If Telstra decided to pay off all their debts from using all profit each year it would take approximately 4 years. However under their current dividend payment policy this could run up to 22 years (most home loans don’t last this long). Whilst not risky perse, if this were your company, would you not rather pay the house off as fast as you can? Or would you rather pay a pittance to the millions and millions of shareholders?

The company should keep its earnings and pay off debt. Once the debt is gone they should focus on finding other businesses that generator the very good returns on equity that Telstra do make and invest yearly profits into them.

What will happen in ten years?
As it stands (and if not much changes) on an equity growth basis I can see the share price going as high as $8.23 while on a profit growth basis this may be as low as $5.92. Compare that to the current share price of $3.24 and it does not look that flash a growth rate. Again, yes I know you get an 8% dividend yield at the moment but I doubt this can be maintained at current debt levels without further investment in growth opportunities ie. More debt or less dividend.

I think I might cool my heels on a further investment in Telstra and wait for another opportunity to come along. If it drops to $1.50 tomorrow I may reconsider.

News.com.au recently published an article about what annoys flight attendants when dealing with passengers. Well excuse me you delicate genius’s I didn’t mean to get in the way of your precious career.

Some of their complaints are

“One of the most annoying things passengers do is not closing the lavatory door,”
Well excuse me precious I didn’t realise the Queen was on board.

“Asking one flight attendant for a drink and before they get back with it, asking another flight attendant for the same drink, is bad news,”
Yes, I am sure you hadn’t taken 20 freakin minutes to get the drink in the first place. The poor passenger probably just thought you had forgotten them, as QUITE OFTEN HAPPENS!!!!

“Passengers tap me to get my attention but then don’t give me eye contact when talking to me,”
What, because you are so ugly that we can barely even look in your general direction you get upset? Get over it loser.

“The worst is when people bring a heavy bag onboard, then tell me that they can’t lift it overhead because of a bad back. Lifting your bag into the overhead bin is not, nor has it ever been, part of my job description. Honestly, I don’t know what bothers me more, the fact that a passenger will come on-board and expect me to lift their bag, or the fact that they actually get upset when I won’t lift the bag,”
You are a bag jockey! get it through your head Bo Gumbo.

“There’d be so many people who’d just throw things on the floor right in the middle of the cabin, such as newspapers they’ve finished with or rubbish,”
If we throw it in the aisle we know you will get rid of it. Pure and simple.

“Trying to sit in our crew rest seats, which are sacred to us, is a very bad idea,”
ooooo the precious crew chairs, don’t disturb the delicate crew.
Get off your chair and your KEISTER AND GET MY DRINK you lazy sods!!!!!!

“Unless you’ve actually been invited into the galley (it does happen), you do not step onto the floor for any length of time,”
Soooo Sorry for stepping onto the floor of the galley. Just trying to squeeze past all you lazy good for nothing attendants gossiping about who George Clooney is sticking this week!

I appreciate that your job is not all that glamorous even though you do get dressed up pretty well for it. If you really don’t like it perhaps you should consider a career where your customers as more considerate… prostitution.

Ok another Group 1 Stradbroke Day at Eagle Farm is upon us and as always I am here to help you out with some of the best advice you have ever read.

In the Stradbroke
Hard To Catch – WILL run at least a place.
Marasco – Is due for a Group 1, expect a bold showing if the track does not get worse
Ortensia – Been going good
Swick – May just surprise

In the Qld Derby Group 1
Awsome Planet – Good lead in, blocked last start, Rogerson has spruiked it…. His last Spruik was Savabeel
Shocking – Kavanagh wins everything
Bid Spotter – Rogerson too
Berlioz – Good line

Brisbane Cup Group 2
Scenic Shot – Going good
Sir Slick – It must win in Australia soon?
Scattergun – Cassidy jumped off Emperator to get on this?
Hume – Newitt on board may just flog it across the line.

Enjoy the day, I know I will!

My favourite band is about to release a new album and here is a taste of it. Here they are live from the set of Conan O’Brien’s first Tonight Show (replacing Jay Leno) PEARL JAM!

Cheers to Pjnikos for the excellent work champ. I loved it even more on the second listen. Good stuff. Blame PJnikos if the below lyrics are wrong but they seem alright to me.

LYRICS:
Every night with the lights out
where you gone
What’s wrong?

Every time you can try
but can’t turn on
a rock song

I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it

Get it now, get it on, before its gone
Let’s everybody carry on
Carrying on
Turn it up, set it off, before its gone
Let’s everybody carry on
Carrying on

This situation, which side are you on?
Are you on the rise, are you falling down?
Let me know…..c’mon let’s go yeah

I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it

Get it now, get it on, before its gone
Let’s everybody get it on
Get it on
Turn it up, set it off, before its gone
Let’s everybody carry on
Carrying on

This situation, which side are you on?
Are you on the rise, are you falling down?
Let me know…..c’mon let’s go yeah

This situation, which side are you on?
Are you on the rise, are you falling down?
Let me know…..c’mon let’s go yeah

I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it

Get it now, get it on, before its gone
Let’s everybody carry on
Carrying on
Turn it up, set it off, before its gone
Let’s everybody carry on
Carrying on

This situation, what side are you on?
Are you dropping bombs, are you getting out?
Have you heard diplomatic resolve? Yeah

Precipitation, which side are you on?
Are you drying up, are you a big drop?
Are you a part of fool detrimental?

Got some
Got some

Carry on
Carry on

I got some if you need it
I got some if you need it

Carry on
Let’s go!

Would you want to run into this man in a dark alley?

I of course would just snap kick him to the skull and be on my merry way but I am sure he would intimidate you.

Season ten of UFC reality television show ‘the Ultimate Fighter’ should be very interesting with the UFC taking a gamble on allowing Kimbo Slice to join the cast. It is quite funny that 12 months ago UFC President Dana White said that there is no way in the world Kimbo could fight in the UFC and he doubts he would even qualify for their reality show. Well here we are

Those of you not aware of him he is probably most famous for the following flogging dealt out to some poor niff nuff in a street fight a few years ago. Warning to those who don’t like violence.

*Scratch that, You Tube deem the movie to violent to embed.

I have included his loss to Petruzelli instead as follows.

He has since moved on to a professional mixed martial arts career with limited success. He submitted former boxing heavyweight champ of the world Kevin Mercer, he cleaned bar room brawler Tank Abbott’s clock and made a mess of James Thompson’s ear but his loss to Seth Petruzelli was of most interest. Slice was scheduled to be fighting against Ken Shamrock, who was pulled out due to a cut above his eye; Petruzelli took the fight one hour before the event began, officially weighing in at 205.5 a whole weight class lower. A jab to Kimbo’s face knocked him silly enabling Petruzelli to secure one of the bigger upsets in MMA history.

Either way it should be interesting to see how Kimbo fits in with the UFC and whether he is good enough to compete with the UFC’s other choices.

I was obviously a little conservative with my analysis that either GM or Ford would go under within 12 months back in my hard hitting story The last Ford v Holden Battle? published in October last year. For some reason I gave a 25% chance that both companies would survive; Idiot!

It has only taken 8 months for one of the former largest manufacturers on earth to run itself into the ground.

Never fear however, Barrack Obama is here! He has printed a whole bunch of new money and has decided to prop up GM so they can try and trade out of trouble. I am not quite sure what GM has been doing for the previous 8 months but apparently they were having no luck getting out of dodge (Viper) so now the government of the United States is going to turn the situation around.

Don’t know if it is likely but it should make for an interesting show.

Note to everyone…. Really really really high debt is bad.

Ok it is time I had a whinge about swine flu. As it stands today, worldwide approximately 18,000 people have caught it with just over 100 being attributed with death because of it. Assuming that all of these deaths are caused by the flu itself that represents 0.66% of all cases. Not sure why I mention this, I just like to convert numbers into percentages…

I demand to know why this Pig Flu has been allowed to simmer?

Let the bastard go! With rising unemployment and increased borrowing I think it is time the world started to think outside the box. Just like the human brain, which allows the slower cells to be killed by alcohol I believe the world should leave their genetically weak to the proverbial wolves.

Yes, some old or weaker people may die even some close to me (or you) but it will be for the greater good of all. Not only that, millions will be saved in tax dollars stopping health officials running around with tissues trying to wipe the nose of those to stupid stay home.

Heck, even I could die. That thought may well please some of you but rest assured, the flu from swine is no match for the least smartest man walking the face of the earth and I promise, my rule will be long, cold and it will last for the rest of your lives!!

Good day to you~